Musings of a Modified Mummy

Fuck Penrith.

Fuck shitty touristy towns.

Fuck the fact that every single ‘to let’ advert is either for a bedsit or one bedroomed flat.

Fuck that ‘professional couples’ are the only desirable tenants.

Fuck that rent prices are more than we even make in a month.

Fuck that ‘No children/Pets/DSS/smokers’ cuts out the people that actually ARE in need of housing.

Fuck the fact that the average wage in Penrith does not even come close to allowing those people to afford a mortgage, and therefore NEED to rent.

Fuck.

I fucking swear to the Flying Spaghetti Monster that if I were ever lucky enough to be in a position of absolute power that IS landlord-ism, I will only take those on the undesirable list.

Ya got kids? Come on in!

Smoker? Sure, here’s the keys!

Pets? clean up after them and you’ve got a deal.

DSS? (As in housing benifit, which you can use even if you are working and need help paying rent, it doesn’t neccessarily mean you’re a lowlife dosser who refuses to work) No worries

My mum is a landlady. She actually just bought another property a few months ago and is in the middle of renovating it. She doesn’t half get some shit tenants (hell, I was one for a while, but that’s a whole other story, to do with abusive bastard boyfriend and near starvation etc) but even if a room does get trashed, they get evicted (legally) and after clearing up they rent again.

My mum believes in giving people a chance. Unlike me, she believes in the inherant good of people. So why the FUCK can’t other money grabbing landlords in the area have a sense of decency and realise that THEY are as much to blame for the hosuing crisis (in this area and others) as much as the primary factors.

And one last fuck. This FUCK goes out to our current landlords Eden Housing Association. Yes, they’ve done so much for us, and I couldn;t be more grateful… but goddamn answer my emaisl and give me a chance to appeal your decision!

If the rest of the landlords in the area weren’t so shit we’d go elsewhere, but we’re stuck.

Fuck it.

Fuck them.

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The weight loss isn’t happening. In fact, I’ve just been putting weight on, because I just can’t stop snacking.

I’m trying to earn some money by selling cakes and cookies, but it’s not happening yet as I’ve had no  interest.

I desperartly want to keep some pet chickens but my land lord/ housing association won’t let me, so I have to appeal.

Callum had all his long hair cut off yesterday

popple and me have been together 5 years yesterday.

We also had a major bust up the other day, and I found out that Pop has started smoking again, the bastard!

Sammy has started cruising around the sofa.

this is more a list for me to leaborate on, feel free to ignore it.

Things should calm down sometime soon, and I can get back to blogging Right now, I wish I had an internal device like they have in Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom, so I could blog without having to get to the PC, lol.

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Two years it has been. Two years since I turned 20 years old and got myself permanently marked on my leg, with a graceful outline of the ivy plant.

Two years, is a damn sight longer than I originally intended to just have an outline on my leg!

Never fear though, for I am going back to mikes tattooz this afternoon, cash in hand, to have the job finished!

(although not finished finished, just coloured in really, as I eventually want to expand it to be part ofa whole leg piece but we’ll not go there shall we.)

Indeed, I, the fair and brave MM, shall be embarking on a journey of pain and pins and needles, to add colour to my ivy.

What colour you ask? Why, Blues and reds of course (and varients inbetween). What would you expect?

Well yeah, so ivy is normally a shade of green. But I don’t actually like green.

I know it seems dumb getting a plant tattoo when I don’t like green okay! I’m getting it purples and blues and reds instead. So ha!

Roll on 4pm

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In my new series regarding Bento Lunches I have made (and typically consumed!) I thought I’d start straight away with this one I made for my son. (and I have already breifly mentioned here)

I have actually seen quite a few ‘bed’ type bento’s , so this idea isn’t one I can pinch and claim as my very own! It works well though if you have messy food underneath the blanket, as it can help keep it all in place.

In this case, this is what was contained under the blanket:

We have cherry tomato’s stuffed with cous cous and feta cheese, carrots and cucumber. It really is that boring! Lol.

Well, carrots and cucumbers are fresh foods that we almost always have in, so they get used an awful lot.

The pigs head is made from a piece of sliced pork loin, with just some seaweed/nori paper cut up into really fiddily shapes which are supposed to resemble closed eyes.

The blanket, and the middle of the ears, are made from some pre sliced Chorizo sausage, which Callum will wolf down if we didn’t stop him!

I have also entered one of my Bento ‘designs’ into a competition over at Feisty Bento , so please do go over and check it out, and vote for your favourite entry

Now, Popple and Callum are away today and tomorrow, so I’m gonna write some posts in advance, clean the kitchen and dining room, and get caught up on feed reading.

Eeek, to much to do, as I’ve gotta go out for my run too!

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Now that I’ve got some more practise and knowledge about bento lunches under my belt (ha!) I’m going to start regularly posting Bento lunches I make.

Because yes, I do photograph almost every single one I make, lol.

Also, on the wonderful night out last week, I stupidly weighed myself on my friends scales. When I realised my weight was over 17 stone, I almost broke down (and certainly did cry!)

So, amongst other things, I am now going to document my attempt at weight loss new lifestyle.

I started looking into, and making, Bento for Callum, whom is not a particularly good eater. However, he was never that bothered, even if the food I made him was super cute. I loved it however, and am carrying on.

As well as minimal exercise (okay, pretty much none) My portion control was out the window. If I had a plate I would fill it, and then go back for more! Hopefully using a Bento box for meals will help me keep my portions under control.

I’m also trying to exercise more, which at the moment is limited to a short jog/walk around the houses where I live in the middle of the night. That way, no one can see me to laugh at me, and I generally have more energy at 11pm anyway!

I won’t be limiting the Bento posts to just my lunches, as some I make for my son are so cute I just have to share them with you.!

And each week I shall be weighing myself and posting it here. Hopefully if I know that real other people out there will be checking to see if I have lost anything each week, I’ll be more inclined to watch what I’m doing. (Peer pressure and all that. I hope you’ll all taunt me well should I start to fail!)

Let the weigh in commence!

Lets’s see. I currently weigh…..

17st 1lb. (Which works out at being about 239lb)

Hmm, I should really do weigh ins on a Wednesday, and give it a catchy letter samey title.

Oh I know, Mortifying Monday! (Y’know, because I’m mortified about how fat I am and all the wobbles and stuff… ahem)

Feel free to encourage/humiliate me in the comments

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It has been… an eventful week.

Last Friday was my 22nd Birthday. Thank you so much to those who sent me birthday greetings.
I had quite a bad day. To be honest. Mostly because of Popple…

We’ve been going through a rough patch, and \I really hoped my birthday would be a nice day, one to remember.

I woke up to hearing Popple and Callum screaming at each other downstairs (They usually get up before me… oops)

I’ll admit, I was kinda hoping for some special treatment. Maybe a Callum made breakfast in bed, or Callum bring me a handmade birthday card with ‘I love you Mummy’ scrawled inside in his childish style. Or maybe Popple greeting me with a hug and a kiss, and then with a flourish, presenting me with a bouquet of flowers and a small gift.

Pah.

No cards, no presents, no hugs… Hell, three (!) websites automated services wished me happy birthday before popple did.

And you know what we did during the day? Took Callum to the park, and ate a rotissary chicken on the park bench with winds threatening to blow it away.

Then we went to my mums, about 5 hours early.

I dunno. Pop had intended that on the day, we’d be going through to get my tattoo finished, but he’d had a weekish before my actual birthday to arrange something else. As we Booked the appointment for the third of march. But nothing.

And yes, I did think that maybe he was making me miserable, because something was planned for later (as you see in every sitcom ever!) And again, it was a no.

I cried, I’ll admit it. I felt bad for it, but I bawled right in my mums living room. And I couldn’t tell her why!

It sucked.

On a shallow, superficial note, I got a good haul. I had asked for a replacement to Frederick, my faithful MP3 player (as he’s pretty much on his last half a leg!), and I got the one I asked for (who has been christened ‘Leroy’)… and a Wii! I was not expecting that, as I had asked for a new mp3 player instead of the wii I knew she was planning to get me.

Thanks mum J

Other news?

Sammy officially started to crawl on the 19th ! And he just discovered yesterday he can actually crawl from room to room! He had a jolly good 20 minutes or so today bashing a plastic bowl on the kitchen floor.

Callum, alas, is not well. He was sent home from school with chicken pox! They didn’t start to itch at all until near bedtime, poor mite. He’s been fine generally, no fever or sickness or anything. Although god knows, it could get worse of course

I’m also working on a new project. My porch. And again, fuck to it being grown up. Retro and ace video games FTW! A Pac man wall, a tetris wall, and space invaders wall! With various gaming elements in the spaces inbetween.I’m thinking portal, lemmings, Mario, sonic, etc. A fun, if epic, project !

Tomorrow (or today, given it’s past midnight) I’m going to a mates house for the evening, and crashing at hers as I can’t get home of my own accord. It’s with a mate I haven’t seen for a while even though when we were younger we used to be at her house everyday (arguing over music channels on the TV, lol. I’d wanna watch kerrang and they’d want to watch the crappy dance music channels, lol)
There should be a few people there who I haven’t seen for a while, and I’m really really looking forward to just hanging out, as if I haven’t given up on life yet.

Oh, another note here. The family dog was put down on Monday. 18th. She was desperately ill, but had lived to 12 years, which I’m told is generous for a Boxer Dog. It’s weird, as I was only told yesterday, and I haven’t been to my mums house since, it hasn’t sunk in yet. She’s dead… but it doesn’t feel like it.

I bought her a rawhide bone a few days before she died. She didn’t get to eat it.

Oh wait. Here it comes.

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Happy birthday to me…

Happy Birthday to me…

Happy Birthday to MeEeee

Happy Birthday to me.

*blows solitary party blower*

(Valentines day sucked btw. Things are rough between Pop and myself right now, which blows but should be sorted out eventually.)

But fuck that. Happy smiley laura doesn’t feel fat and miserable!

*dances*

Good news: On the 3rd of march I’ll FINALLY be getting my leg tattoo filled in.

I got the outline done on my 20th birthday… which is now officially 2 years ago! 2 Years of outline?! Pah. Now I shall have blue/purple ivy on my leg (I don’t like green, lol)

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